A mom and a stepmom share stories, ideas, friendship and family
Posted in Parenting on Apr 9th, 2008
One of the things I had to learn as a newbie stepparent is that I can’t do stuff for the kids because I’m counting on it earning me points, love, appreciation, affection, cooperation, understanding or anything else. I can do stuff for the kids because I want to do it, but I need to expect [...]
Posted in Logistics on Apr 3rd, 2008
When I first got involved in helping the kids navigate through their daily lives, there were so many friends and appointments and lessons that it was hard for me to remember where they all were, or even to keep track of all of the addresses. So, I created a private Google map. Every time I [...]
When I was little and I got sick, my mom would tuck me into my bed or under blankets on the couch and give me a bell so I could ring for her when I needed her. My mom’s bell had a stained glass handle and lived on the bookcase when everyone was healthy. Mine [...]
No One’s the Bitch is a blog by a mom-stepmom team about building happy mom-stepmom realtionships. Jen (the mom) and Carol (the stepmom) are close friends now, but they didn’t start out that way at all. Jen has knocked the ball out of the park with two must-read posts in the last few days:
How to [...]
Posted in Holidays on Dec 26th, 2007
I keep this list of human needs posted on the refrigerator to help myself articulate what’s going on with me. Here are the things I find myself wanting deeply around holiday times:
acceptance
affection
appreciation
belonging
inclusion
to be seen
to be known
to be understood
presence
safety
choice
freedom
space
It’s not that it’s anyone’s (or any group of people’s) job to intuit what I want or to [...]
Posted in Perspectives on Dec 20th, 2007
At first it’s like two straight men waking up one morning to find their hands superglued to each other’s balls.
You’re intimately connected in places that feel downright wrong to be connected. She’s connected to your guy and you’re connected to her children in ways that feel fantastically uncomfortable at a gut level.
And you’re surprised. You [...]
Inspired by Samara and Lori, we decided to make Christmas cookies together, too. Kathy called me up with the idea and invited me over.
I asked Kathy if she had some candles she could light for more photogenic cooking.
We got a little silly. (Kathy threw herself into the photo shoot. And then she let me post [...]
One of the things that keeps me from feeling overwhelmed by other people’s stuff (and that helps keep me from feeling like a nag at the same time) is our house lost and found. It’s a big basket that we keep on the window seat in the dining room. When I find something laying around [...]
Posted in Communication, Tips on Nov 27th, 2007
Last year we set up a single email address for both of our houses. It instantly autoforwards to all of us (Kathy, G, and me) at our individual email accounts. It’s the email address we give to the kids’ schools, summer camp and extracurricular organizations, and this way we all know that everyone gets all [...]
What kind of women are we? We are bad women. Why does this delight us so? We’re not sure, but it does.
More pictures here.
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