The DHX: The Doughtie Houses Exchange

The three day rule was Kathy’s idea. If something happens that upsets one of us or that we’re mad or hurt about, we have to talk about it with the other one within three days. If we can’t bring ourselves to do that, we have to let it go. It’s no longer “mad-able”. It can’t [...]

Read Full Post »

Last night G and I were out at a party at our friends’ apartment. It wasn’t rowdy. There was no loud music. At midnight, someone came up and knocked on the door and said in an annoyed voice, “I understand your need to hang, but I’m trying to sleep.” We all quieted down right away [...]

Read Full Post »

Pain looks different from the inside than it does from the outside.
From the inside when we act out in pain, we see ourselves as victims. From the outside, when we act out in pain, we look like monsters.
Outsiders who haven’t lived through a similar kind of suffering don’t see the pain; they see the actions.
The [...]

Read Full Post »

Back in the early days when Kathy and I weren’t getting along, I read her blog a lot. A lot. And her book, too.
A stepmom blogger recently found from watching her blog stats that her stepkids’ mom was reading her blog, and that she was visiting the blogs of the stepmoms she linked to. [...]

Read Full Post »

In addition to our single email address, we’ve also set up a shared online calendar. We use Google Calendar, which lets us use as many color-coded sub-calendars as we like, with individual levels of privacy and editing rights. If seeing all of the calendars becomes too overwhelming, we can check a box to display or [...]

Read Full Post »