“When it comes to divorce, may happy extended families one day be the norm!” –Jennifer Newcomb Marine, No One’s the Bitch
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About us

Katherine Shirek Doughtie is the mom. She is the author of Aphrodite in Jeans: Adventure Tales about Men, Midlife and Motherhood, and also blogs at Kathy's Blog.

Jill Davis Doughtie is the stepmom. She can also be found at Pasadena Housewife, Eye Level Pasadena, and friendfeed/jilldoughtie.
More about us
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Our peeps:
G is Chris and Jack's dad and husband to Jill.
Chris is a teenager. He's Kathy and G's son, and Jill's stepson.
Jack is a tweenager (as he likes to be called). He's Kathy and G's son, and Jill's stepson.
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Recent Comments
- Jennie on Byron Katie: “The only way I can be angry at you…”
- Alison on About
- Heidi on The Saboteur
- Lori on The Saboteur
- Mom on The Saboteur
- Jennifer (Et Tu?) on The Cinemascope Version
- Natalie on The Cinemascope Version
- Jennifer on The Cinemascope Version
- Yo on The Cinemascope Version
- Jill on Erma Bombeck: “a strange little band of characters”
- Little Wren on Erma Bombeck: “a strange little band of characters”
- Shannon on Wanting what’s best for the kids
- AP on Erma Bombeck: “a strange little band of characters”
- AI on Byron Katie: “If I think that you are my problem…”
- Natalie on Erma Bombeck: “a strange little band of characters”
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Books Boundaries Co-parenting Communication Discipline Divorce Food Holidays Introductions Links Logistics Love Miscellaneous Movies, TV & music Parenting Peacemaking Perspectives Pictures Play Quotes Remarriage Stories Tips
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More of us
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Kathy's book
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Books about peacemaking and communication

If Jill could recommend only one book on building a better mom-stepmom relationship, it would be The Anatomy of Peace, and it's not even about stepfamilies. It's about helping things go right in all kinds of relationships. Related posts

People with drastically different communication styles can appear hostile to each other when they think they are signaling friendliness and consideration. That's Not What I Meant! is like the Rosetta stone. Related posts

One of the key ideas in this book is no one's needs in a relationship can be sacrificed. Not our own, and not anyone else’s. This book is about identifying and communicating feelings and needs in ways that are easier to hear, and it's about listening through difficult conversations for the feelings and needs others are trying to communicate. Related posts -
Books about co-parenting
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Books about stepparenting
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Parenting books

The Parent Effectiveness Training book is our parenting bible. It's a guide to parenting with respect, consideration for everyone's needs, and without manipulation. It has probably also informed our relationship with each other. Do we always follow it perfectly? No, but we try. Related posts

How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk is a great to read alongside the P.E.T. book above. The conversational techniques it teaches dovetail with the P.E.T. approach.

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Stories about stepfamily life, life after divorce, and starting over

My Father Married Your Mother is collection of essays about real life stepfamily experiences by authors including Barbara Kingsolver, Sandra Tsing Loh, Jacquelyn Mitchard, Susan Cheever, and more. Related posts

Elizabeth Gilbert was recently divorced and miserable when she decided she wanted to travel around the world for a year, focusing on pleasure in Italy, devotion in India, and balance in Bali, and then write a book about it. She’s believable, she’s loveable, and she’s larger than life but not intimidating. She’s like a best friend or a sister calling that the water’s warm, the world is wild, and happiness after heartbreak is possible — even better than before. Related posts -
Books for working through difficult times
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On the lighter side

If you're looking for a lighter treatment of divorce and remarriage, look no further. Zsa Zsa Gabor is your woman. Even though it's mostly funny and over the top, there are some nuggets of wisdom in this book. And some joy and love and affection. Related posts -
Not exactly books
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Blended family, single parent and co-parenting blogs
- 21st Century Stepdad Man
- A New Beginning
- A Stepmom’s Say
- Amygdala Thoughts
- Another Mama
- Black and Blended
- Blue Bamboo
- Busy Mom Online
- Call Me Crazy…
- Chelly’s Equilibrium
- Child of Divorce/Child of God
- Chronicles of the Never-Mom
- Clever Escape
- Continuing the Stepparenting Journey
- CRockStar Wannabe
- Dad’s House
- Diary of a Playground Dropout
- DivorcingDaze
- Earthquake in Zipland
- eRamblings
- Fashion, Recipes and Reality
- Flustered
- Helping kids cope with the split
- Hindsight, Relationships & Looking Inside Me
- Hip Girlz
- I am the MOM
- In this house, I’m the Mama…
- It’s a Love Thing - My Life as a Stepmother
- Little Wren
- LoriAnn’s Cafe
- mommyhood
- No one’s the bitch
- Not So Nuclear
- Peter Ehrlich: My Writing
- She who laughs, lasts
- Simplicity in the Suburbs
- Single Mother on the Verge
- Single Parents Blog
- Step by Step
- step up
- Step-family Talk
- Step-mommyhood
- Stepdaddyblog.com
- stepdadsecrets.com
- Stepmomologue
- Stepmother’s Milk
- Suburban Turmoil
- That and Two Dimes
- The Blender
- The Fairy Stepmonster
- The Girls in Circles
- The Mommy Blog
- The New Wife Vents - Stories of a Stepmom
- The Not-So-Evil Stepmom
- The Ommy Diaries Weblog
- The Perfect Blend
- The real world
- The Separated Man
- The Smirking Cat
- TheStepfamilyLife
- tortious
- Typical Momma
- Who Could Ask For Anything More?
- Wisdom for Divorced Parents: Blog
- Woulda Coulda Shoulda
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