Why Do I Love These People?
Apr 3rd, 2008 by Jill
“Why Do I Love These People?” Understanding, Surviving and Creating Your Own Family
Po Bronson interviewed and visited numerous families over a period of months, looking for information about how they made their family lives work. “In Why Do I Love These People?” he told the stories of nineteen of these families, one of which was his own.
Some stories are about deepening understanding between family members over time. Some stories are about loosening certain ties while strengthening others. Some stories are about refocusing family centers. Some stories are about the growth of a few family members. All of the stories are about family transformation — usually gradual transformation.
I’m not sure I would have been able to articulate this to myself at the time, but I started this book thinking there were two distinct approaches to family life: some people hold tightly to their biological families (loyalty), and some people exercise more choice about their families — including and emphasizing close friends in their family circles (creativity). I realized by the end of the book that most of the families in it — and maybe most families — drew from both approaches: loyalty and creativity. They valued their biological family ties, and they also used trial and error and choice and elasticity in figuring out how their families would configure themselves and what they would focus on.
