Links for Thursday, March 27
Mar 27th, 2008 by Jill
- Jennifer Wolf: Top 10 Ways to Rebuild Trust With Your Ex – “9. Visualize a Positive Future – Visualization can be a powerful tool in creating the future you want for your children and yourself. Instead of focusing all your energy on what has not gone well in the past, create an image in your mind of what it might look like if you were able to collaborate for the sake of the kids. Imagine a future where you can co-parent effectively, communicate clearly, and put the pain of your shared past behind you.” (more)
- Len Stauffenger: How Not To Hate Your Ex Or Feel Guilty About Your Divorce – “Get some help to figure out what you did wrong so that you don’t have to make the same mistake over and over again. If you indulge in guilt, it will keep you stuck in your hurt and painful feelings. It’s not reasonable to stay here… Analyzing your ex’s bad points won’t help you have a more successful marriage or subsequent relationship… In order to create a successful marriage or relationship and not enter into a second divorce, it’s a wise idea to drop the concepts of guilt and blaming your ex. It’s a wiser thing yet to take ownership of what ever role you played in that drama, clean up your own act, and create the next good thing in your life.” (more)
- The Ommy Diaries: Do You Really Know? – “…[N]ot everyone held the same opinion of her as we did. That piqued my curiosity. She had to have some amount of good in her… Furthermore I knew that my husband was a human being with his own limitations… Perhaps if she and I had met under other circumstances, we might have been friends… Had I been her friend, I might have even sympathized with her plight. Perhaps I would have viewed her as the victim and us as the perpetrators. Everything looks different from varying perspectives.” (more)
I read Len’s article and it made me wonder why we always feel the need to be right? Sometimes we have to take our selves out of the equation and focus on others around us. Since I have reached that epiphany, I’ve traded in my need to be right for the need to have peace. Peace is totally underrated.